So, my 40th birthday was a few days ago. You can’t tell but I’m cringing. Not that 40 is bad, but becoming this age has me questioning a lot of things in my life even more than I already do. I feel that I am in an even more reflective state due to the new year.
1)Losing friends to parenthood. I found out the other day that another one of my friends is pregnant for the first time. I am totally happy for her, but I know that when my friends have had kids, I usually rarely see them after that. They tend to hang out more with their couple friends that have kids and go to kid centered events. So, in a way, I feel like I am losing another friend. My husband and I don’t plan on having any of our own kids, so it’s almost like a death of a friendship when more of our friends have children.
2) My career. I feel stagnant in my career at the moment. Yes, I am accomplishing things like writing up a research paper and a review article, and planning a work conference to Vegas, but I still feel like i’m not far enough ahead to where I thought I would be right now.
3) Has my life peaked already? This thought is so damaging to the psyche. I remember my lust for life that I used to have when I was younger and I don’t feel that way anymore. I’ve already accomplished a lot in my life and I’ve traveled a lot, so I always wonder, have I already been through the best times of my life?
4) How will I feel, health wise, as I get older? You may have already read my posts about having chronic pain. It impacts my day to day life and gets in the way of many things I used to enjoy. I wonder if my health will continue to deteriorate as I get older. I ordered 23 and me kits for my husband and I this Christmas and I’ll am curious to find out if I am a carrier of any of the genetic disorders that they test for.
So, those are my biggest concerns at the moment. I am trying to think of ways to stay positive before I go down the rabbit hole of sadness and depression. Here are some things that I hope will help myself and maybe some of my readers.
- Thinking this will be a great year, my best year yet. Mindset is everything. I plan to set clear goals and give myself timelines to reach them. Then, in reaching these goals, there is a confidence and drive that comes from accomplishments and that will in turn create more motivation.
a) Write the manuscript and review article – when I finish these, I think I will have more motivation at work
b) Meet some new scientists at the conference in Vegas – meeting new scientists with new ideas usually gives me a renewed energy about my research and helps me to come up with new ideas for my own scientific interests.
c) Write at least 24 new blog posts – this will help me pursue my bigger goal of writing my own book. I hope to gain more followers and interact more with my readers.
d) Remodel the bathrooms in my house – My plan is to create a spa-like atmosphere in our master bathroom. Feeling relaxed and zen is always a mood booster.
e) Connect more with my friends that I haven’t seen in a long time. I have old friends in PA that I haven’t seen in months/ years. They were some of my closest and dearest friends. There is a hole in my heart from moving away from them. So, I plan to travel back to see many of them in the spring so that we can reconnect.
2. I will focus on becoming healthier than I am. My husband and I recently started following the paleo diet. I would say we follow it about 80% of the time and I have felt a major change in my energy levels and how I feel from eating more fresh fruits, vegetables, and lean protein. We cut out unhealthy snacks and cut way back on sugar. My biggest goal from this diet was to just feel better and have more energy. If I lose a few pounds along the way even better.
3. I will plan at least two things that I haven’t done before. Did you ever have an event or trip coming up that made you so excited and you looked forward to it for weeks or months? There are many different things I’ve been wanting to try and I haven’t yet. I am thinking along the lines of:
a) Seeing the ice castles in New Hampshire and staying there for a weekend getaway.
b) Trying a new art class like glass blowing or pottery making.
c) Selling my works at a farmer’s market type of event. My husband and I made these crazy fun desserts over Christmas and I am thinking of attending a weekly farmer’s market to sell some of them with my Mother in law.
What about you? Has the new year or a birthday spurred you to set some new goals for the year ahead? If so, what are they?